Martini Lifestyle, Beer Budget

Evolution!

2010-09-30T14:17:00.003-04:00

I suppose you might be wondering what's become of me.

Well, among other things I've started a law firm, dived headfirst into vintage, and enrolled in the Master Gardeners program (shut up, it's fun).

As such, Martini needs a facelift. So, I'm taking it to tumblr, bitches.

If you find that you still need sweet deals, stompy boots, and wiener dogs--now with a MARTINI 2.0 twist--click this way.

Photo: Every Red Heart Shines by Valkyrie

New Additions!

2010-08-01T18:27:00.002-04:00

Yeah, I hate the model's face too. Just focus on the cute dress (now in my eBay store)!

Sweetees 'Katya' silk dress

At least this model looks friendly:

Martin + Osa navy stripe top

The dress was worn one time, and is like new. The shirt is new with tags!

As before, with any of the items in my eBay store, Martini Lifestyle readers will receive FREE SHIPPING* with code FREEMARTINI in the "notes" section at purchase.

*Shipping fee will be refunded after purchase is complete, so long as the code is present in the "notes" section, or you contact me via email at martini.lifestyle@gmail.com with FREEMARTINI in the subject line.

**International readers/buyers, I can't offer you totally free shipping with this code, BUT, I will refund HALF your total shipping cost if you use FREEMARTINI as above.

Heeheehee

2010-07-28T19:09:00.002-04:00

This ridiculous vintage purse gives me the giggles.

Surefire Pick-Me-Up: Asian Snack Packaging

2010-07-26T17:02:00.002-04:00

Rough day?
Crazy week?
Quit your job after months and months of planning to quit your job (Ahem, me :D)?

Well, check out this sweet and sexy thrill: cruising Asian snack mascots at the local H-Mart. Oh yes.

Listen monkey, I don't think anyone should allow their children anywhere near you...

Gang-Sign Mowhawk Gun-Finger McCorn? You're not allowed near the kids either.
And stay away from my car.

Whoah. Cowboy Corn with teeth. Better than corn with mowhawk? Not sure...

...and yet, I don't think this sad sad girl agrees with what everyone says...

Hark, a potato.

That is all for today. Fashion will return later this week...

Baby Canteloupe!!

2010-07-24T13:03:00.001-04:00

Baby Canteloupe!!, originally uploaded by verylegalmuffin.

Baby Canteloupe!!

Photo of me...

2010-07-21T15:08:00.001-04:00

Dark Creature at Table, source unknown, originally uploaded by verylegalmuffin.

...seriously though, I would love use this image as my professional headshot. Who wouldn't jump at the chance to hire a lawyer who looked like that? I would certainly jump at the chance.

Source unknown, but I'd love to learn the who/where/how if any of you know...

Next Up

2010-07-20T10:36:00.006-04:00

Must. Thin out. Closet! I'll be posting this next batch today...

Coming to the store tonight...

2010-07-18T17:14:00.007-04:00

UPDATE: They're in, folks! Browse away. Remember, free shipping with FREEMARTINI in notes at checkout. International buyers get 1/2 off shipping with same code.

These and more. Let me know if you see anything you'd like to take a pre-ebay crack at...

Legend...not known for his 90-degree weather stamina

2010-07-15T23:45:00.001-04:00

Legend...not known for his 90-degree weather stamina, originally uploaded by verylegalmuffin.

Legend...not known for his 90-degree weather stamina

Long Day, Weenie Butt

2010-07-15T19:26:00.001-04:00

Long Day, Weenie Butt, originally uploaded by verylegalmuffin.

Long Day, Weenie Butt

More Sales! More Free Shipping!

2010-07-15T12:40:00.010-04:00

This week, we have several new items in the eBay store that must go (both starting at $9.99!):

Martin & Osa soft grey belted "shirt" skirt

Naughty Monkey "Missing in Action" tortoiseshell and black patent flats

The skirt is new, with tags, and in its M&O wrapper. The shoes were worn outside one time, so they have some minor marks on the bottoms, but are otherwise perfect.

As before, with any of the items in my eBay store, Martini Lifestyle readers will receive FREE SHIPPING* with code FREEMARTINI in the "notes" section at purchase.

*Shipping fee will be refunded after purchase is complete, so long as the code is present in the "notes" section, or you contact me via email at martini.lifestyle@gmail.com with FREEMARTINI in the subject line.

**International readers/buyers, I can't offer you totally free shipping with this code, BUT, I will refund HALF your total shipping cost if you use FREEMARTINI as above.

Sale Time, and Free Shipping! Woo!

2010-07-07T23:02:00.005-04:00

I'm rounding up the items I've purchased over the past few months that didn't quite fit as I'd hoped and posting them on the eBay store, priced to move! Seriously...I need the space, and they're just sitting there! On the block this week:

1. Vivienne Tam

2. Bloch

3. Cynthia Steffe

4. Vintage Bandolino

5. ADAM Adam Lippes

6. Stuart Weitzman

I plan to post another host of closet (and hall, and spare bedroom, and and and) cleaning sales in the coming weeks. For now, on any of the items in my eBay store, Martini Lifestyle readers will receive FREE SHIPPING* with code FREEMARTINI in the "notes" section at purchase.

*Shipping fee will be refunded after purchase is complete, so long as the code is present in the "notes" section, or you contact me via email at martini.lifestyle@gmail.com with FREEMARTINI in the subject line.

**International readers/buyers, I can't offer you totally free shipping with this code, BUT, I will refund HALF your total shipping cost if you use FREEMARTINI as above.

Happy hunting :)

Fairly Accurate Representation

2010-07-02T21:45:00.001-04:00

Gil Elvgren - Diving Board Pinup, originally uploaded by verylegalmuffin.

...of how I'll look this week! At the beach! Wheeeeee....

Go on sale! Go on sale!

2010-06-30T13:28:00.003-04:00

Moscow-in-Bloom blouse, $98

(FOREVERRRRRR >:-( BLARRRRGH )

Tried it on, it looks great (actually, way better than the pic), perfect for summer, loose but slimming, has been in stock for several months, lots of markdowns currently happening...WHY WON'T THIS BLOUSE GO ON SALE ALREADY??? * mashes head against keyboard *

Tyrannosaurus Weenie

2010-06-30T12:08:00.002-04:00

Skinny little Peanut sure is fierce.

:D

Stripes!

2010-06-25T15:45:00.006-04:00

This afternoon, I've been enjoying a nice little fantasy about purchasing this dress (caveat: shopping budget currently does not permit the actualization of said fantasy):

Built by Wendy pleat dress
$198 from $288

I would pair it with my new brown belt (purchased here):

And my new blue shoes (purchased here):

Hmmm for now I'll pair the accessories with the dresses I already own...

I'M BEING VERY GOOD. And, Some Summer Whites...

2010-06-23T12:16:00.004-04:00

Oh, hey, look at that...Twinkle by Wenlan, one of my favorite designers, is on Gilt and all discounted and stuff. [* bites knuckle *] I will resist, dammit, and not buy these two dresses. [* longing gaze *]

'Earth's Heaven' dress

$119 from $315

Woven, dotted shift dress
$135 from $342

Moneyed bastards, please find your Gilt access here.

Wearing (an Overview), and WORN (a Magazine)

2010-06-17T12:57:00.020-04:00

What am I wearing this summer? Let's cruise through the most recent additions to my closet...

The Dresses: Not too short, not too long, somewhere between form-fitting and easy-breathing...

Leifsdottir 'Red Shibori' silk dot dress

$129 from $298

(Note: this one might get sent back if the fit isn't perfect...)

Tracy Reese silk cummerbund dress
$100 from $295

The Blouses: This season, I've focused on vintage-style blouses with flattering sleeves, so that I can wear them through the day without a shell or cardigan coverup.

Vintage coral cotton blouse
$28

Trovata striped cotton top with ruffly detail
$49 from $150

Edme & Esyllte pouf-sleeve navy cotton blouse
$39.95 from $78

Jill Stuart dot silk 'Katy' blouse

$72 from $265
(Note: Because my torso is short, it does not look like a crop top on me. It's great with high-waisted skirts.)

The Skirts: When it's hot outside, a flowy cotton skirt is the only possible answer.

Leifsdottir 'Ashri flower' pleated skirt
$69 from $198

Vintage 'French blue' button-front skirt
$36

Floreat 'Pulsations' red and white striped cotton skirt
$39 from $78
(Note: sold out online, but still available in stores)

The Shoes: Sandals (finally!), BRIGHT BLUE SHOES (Wooo!), and Repettos (no surprise there...)

Vintage woven T-strap wedge sandals
$38

Vintage leather electric blue peep toe heels
$32

Repetto 'BB' bright red patent leather ballet flats
$130 from $290

(And, may I add, these were very difficult to find. Thanks, eBay recurring search function!)

As you can see, summer's wardrobe has been brought to us today by:
Gilt (access here),
Etsy (Golden Vintage and Bee Keeper),
RueLaLa (access here),
Anthropologie (sale section!), and
eBay

No real surprises there :) What's your favorite summer shopping locale? Is it virtual or actual?

P.S., WORN's shoe issue, image at top, is my current exciting fashion read. I'm also getting into their online content...

Let me be excruciatingly clear: I do not read fashion-based literature. It makes me slightly nauseated and dizzy. This magazine, however, has some actual substance to it. It makes me feel excited and intrigued instead of resentful and fat.

Per the editors' description: " instead of concentrating on trends and pushing products, we explore the concepts and ideas of clothing." I like to think of it as a nerdier Jane Magazine, and from Canada. Bliss! Now excuse me while I return to my article on the art of boot repair...

Eyeball This

2010-06-16T14:05:00.010-04:00

I have always been a fan of articles sporting hamsa and evil eye motifs. Imagine my delight when I saw the Otrera silk scarves on Swirl this morning! Lightweight for summer, and protection against evil. And, on sale! Hooray. Some favorites:

No swirlies yet? Swirl access here!

Holy Cow There's an Eggplant Already!

2010-06-16T09:48:00.001-04:00

eggplant!, originally uploaded by verylegalmuffin.

This little guy greeted me from my deck this morning--and surprised the crap out of me. All the other plants are still in the barely-flowering stage, and here comes an already three-inch-long eggplant?!? Awesome.

More Blue Shoe Drool...

2010-06-14T13:03:00.005-04:00

The quest continues, but I'd love to consider these blue-ies if my Gilt wishlisted pair ever pops...

Stuart Weitzman Blue 'Exert' Peeptoe Pump,
$149 from $335

Heck, they'd look great with this ring...once I get that 500% raise I've been gunning for...

Arunashi Chalcedony Flower Ring,
$1,149 from $2,280 (a real steal, no?)
No Gilt access? Click here!

Favorite Summer Blouse

2010-06-14T11:48:00.003-04:00

The 'To the Sun' Blouse, now on sale at Anthropologie ($39.95 from $78), is my current summer wardrobe favorite.

It has enough volume and crisp cotton flowiness to combat the dreaded trapped-inside-my-suit feeling that often accompanies a workday of 100% humidity and 95 degrees F, but it does NOT have the excessive waist-and-hip volume that so many of these "peasanty" shirts lose points on (i.e., Help! I am a petite human and this peasant shirt is eating my torso!!!).

Win and win in navy and summer white :)

Dear Goldyn,

2010-06-08T15:20:00.003-04:00

I request a better sale.

Loeffler Randall Esther platform pump
$345 from $425

Loeffler Randall Yvette snake-y cut-out bootlet
$495 from $575

No matter how much I am ( / have been / will be) drooling, these very attractive shoes are still just a smidge out of my practical price range. So quit telling me how great your sale is with your big, pretty emails. * Huff * * Puff *

Outfit Redux

2010-06-05T21:40:00.004-04:00

Hot day = skirty shirty blousy look:

Top: here and here, skirt here, shoes here :D

Pin Dots

2010-06-02T10:56:00.004-04:00

...are a particular favorite of mine, as are houndsteeth. So, for the love of all that is good in the world, could one of my not-on-a-shopping-diet size 8 readers please purchase this blouse and enjoy it in my honor? Pretty please?

Jill Stuart dot silk 'Katy' blouse, $89.99 from $265

le sigh. Damn you, shopping diet.

Summer One-Piece...Obtained!

2010-05-25T14:00:00.000-04:00

Generally speaking, I favor bikinis at the beach. I do keep a one-piece in reserve, however, for beachy-and/or-swimmy activities that are well...more active.

For days when you won't be that girl who washes up on the beach sans bikini:

SPANX Teal Triangle Top One-Piece,
$79 from $198

RueLaLa personal invitation link here!

Springy Scarves, V+R, Arrrr...

2010-05-25T10:22:00.008-04:00

While I'm not a fan of the name, "Modnique" (I mean really? Really? I can hear the pitch now: "Let's call ourselves something that makes people think we're both modern and unique..."), these V+R scarves at 85% off have caused me to overlook the obsequious groupthink-style name...for now.

Blue Silk V+R Ribbon Logo, $57.75 from $385

Red Silk V+R Seal Logo, $36 from $240

Green Dot Cotton Heart Swarm, $36 from $240

...when folded (as below), the heart is not so hearty-hearty-heart-heart. I like it. Favorite.

As far as I can tell, Modnique is invitation-only, so use my access link here, and "rachel.hersh@gmail.com" as your INVITATION CODE.
Scarfspeed!

Spinach!

2010-05-25T09:59:00.002-04:00

Rainy spring = spinach spinach spinach.

Puppy Noses

2010-05-23T10:14:00.005-04:00

This pretty much sums up my weekend relaxation plans so far :)

Chie!

2010-05-14T14:12:00.006-04:00

Darling's gotten herself a new pair of twisty classics...

Chie Mihara 'Kolin' heels
$134 from $385
(Reflects the price I paid after an additional 30% off with discount code 'COCLICOCANDY' at checkout)

Ah, the shape! the colors! the details! Swoon.

P.S., I think the discount code above expires 05/18 and applies to everything for sale at Coclico's online store ...but I had to email the folks at Coclico to get it applied to the order I placed last night. Just a warning in case you decide to buy--follow up and make sure the discount gets applied!

Dipping a toe into Summer White...

2010-05-14T13:27:00.005-04:00

I've had a persistent request (T!) for posts on Summer Whites, dresses in particular. I'll see what I can do. In the mean time, here's an item from my own whites wishlist:

Cotton Latticework Blouse, $41.60 from $52
(apply discount code 'SUMMER' at checkout for 20% off sitewide...)

(Yes, I'm aware this is more of an off-white...still. It's nice.)

Chilly and sunny

2010-05-10T11:41:00.007-04:00

Is this thing on? Heh. Hi there. Did you miss me?

It's chilly still. Regardless, I wholeheartedly endorse pulling those summer dresses out of the closet, like NOW. Slap on a cute midweight coat and a long ridiculous scarf and you'll be set. I'm favoring careful pattern mixing (see the dress, scarf, and shoes) along a single color scheme with a neutral backdrop these days...

Case study:

Jill Stuart 'Madrid Sasha' Dress, $124.95 from $497

Optional: Belt It.

Snakebite Belt, $32

Cover:

Free People Tailored 'Gianna' Jacket (and in black, here), $69.95 from $198

or,

Marc Marc Jacobs 'Glove Leather' Jacket, $348.99 from $698

Wrap and cover:

Polka Dot Infinity Scarf, $20.65 from $29.50

Loft Large Ombre Sunglasses, $24.50 (2 pairs for $34!)
(I have several pairs of these sunglasses, and they are enormously excellent)

Add shoes, of course!

Giuseppe Zanotti Blue Sequined Ballet Flats, $130 from $521 (ooOOOooooOOoo)

Handsome and sparkly and blue and crazily on sale. My kind of shoe.

Repeat as necessary with progressively smaller/thinner jackets until the weather is in proper summer form.

(Painted models photo at top, source unknown)

Accesssssssssorize me, please.

2010-04-26T18:35:00.004-04:00

Boobs!

Hee hee hee hee hee. Now that I have your attention, check out these Venomous Snake Head cufflinks by Wmdean!
Whether your man happens to be a closeted Tom Riddle, or if you yourself prefer to rock the french cuff (with a reptilian grace)...these little heads are an excellent find, particularly at $19.99!

Oh, and more info on the boobs above can be found here.

It's time for a new quilt...

2010-04-09T13:27:00.004-04:00

If I were a flower, I'd definitely be pregnant right now. Thankfully, I'm not a flower. Nor do I have any pollen allergies to speak of...which comes in handy when the outdoors are naught but a green haze, and my weekend chore list starts with: Shovel the damn pollen off the car.

All the greening and fertilizing has, however, given me an "update the bedroom" bug. Since the marrying and moving happened, we really haven't done much with the bedroom, other than (me) complain loudly that nothing fits in the space right and (husband) wish there were room for my bureau.
I'm looking at the double-sided Sundra Blossom Quilt (pictured throughout) and it's my current front-runner for the job (the green side especially). Who knows what new things will pop up as my search continues...

Woven Ring

2010-03-29T12:41:00.002-04:00

I usually prefer to keep my costume jewelry to a minimum, but this neato woven 'Belmont' ring ($45 from $90) at the Gorjana sale on Fuse today has caught my attention...

Fuse access here!

Want wanty WANT

2010-03-29T10:11:00.005-04:00

Just look at these adorable eyelet closures! Next time I blur the line between jeans and leggings, I hope to do it with this clever creation!

7 For All Mankind 'Gwenevere' with Hook and Eye, $198

(will be searching for a sale on these...)

Gratuitous Weenie: Legend Edition

2010-03-23T14:22:00.004-04:00

Despite the warm weather this weekend, fat little Legend the dachshund stayed true to his burrowing-creature instincts and spent the whole afternoon under a heavy feather comforter. This is a shot of him, jubilant and panting like a speeding locomotive, during a brief trip to the surface for some air. Please excuse the horrible quality of the photo--I think Legend's expression more than makes up for it :D

Michael vs. Marc

2010-03-22T23:09:00.006-04:00

We've got blue, we've got classic cut, we've even got some silk.

Who does it best? Michael? or, Marc?

Take an extra 20% off either of them with discount code 'FFMARCH' at Bloomingdales, through March 28, 2010

Bloomingdales 20% Off FF Sitewide!

2010-03-22T13:08:00.003-04:00

Outfit?

Sanctuary top, French Connection skirt, and Sam Edelman 'Cory' oxfords

Ohhhh springtime color attack, brought to you courtesy of the Bloomingdales friends and family 20% off everything event, with discount code 'FFMARCH'. Code valid on most shoes/apparel and home items, through March 28, 2010.

I Bought a Shovel

2010-03-22T10:26:00.002-04:00

On the way to work this morning, I spotted this little impromptu patch of grass growing over a submerged brick in the sidewalk. From up close, it looks like a small green field instead of nasty old weeds. Incidentally, I bought a shovel yesterday. This year I'm gardening outside! Woot.

Good Morning, Depressed Whale

2010-03-16T09:17:00.003-04:00

Don't ask me why, but this video is making my morning just that much better.

Looking Houndstoothily Into the Future

2010-03-15T10:15:00.005-04:00

I realized today that my beloved A-line houndstooth wool pea coat, the one I have worn constantly throughout the past two winter seasons, is becoming a bit...well, worn-looking. As in, the black and white houndsteeth are melding into an indeterminate gray wool blur. I suppose this is a testament to my undying love for the 'teeth, but where to turn now that my favorite coat is on the wane?

Soia & Kyo's asymmetrical belted offering has caught my eye, and is my current favorite contender--particularly with its convertible funnel collar:
At $265 from $365 currently at Bluefly, my interest is piqued, but I would still like to see it on slightly deeper sale. The search/wait continues...

UPDATE:
This bizarre drapey houndstooth cardigan by Caroline Rose is also on my radar, but at $197 from $395 at Neiman Marcus, I'm holding out.

Short Boot Spotlight

2010-03-14T21:29:00.003-04:00

Now that I've broken the short-boot seal on my life, I'm seeing candidates for part deux, everywhere.

ATM, Gilt is having a veritable bootstravaganza. Sadly no Rosegolds this time, but here there are some nice short Modern Vintages on deck:

Modern Vintage 'Parker,'
$99 from $325

Clean lines, killer platform, le sigh.

Gilt access here.

Birthday Outfits!

2010-03-10T10:04:00.010-05:00

(Thanks, Em, for donating your lips :) )

Guess who's got a birthday this week?

Me!

Birthday outfit idea #1...

Blouse, Skirt, Shoes (goddamit, Chie Mihara, quit tempting me like this!)

Birthday outfit idea #2...

Dress, Shoes (sigh. still looking for the perfect blue shoes...)

Or, perhaps, these shoes instead?

Decisions decisions...

Red, 100% Cashmere Coat for...How Much?

2010-03-04T14:44:00.005-05:00

Millard Fillmore cashmere 'military' trench coat,

$60 from $355

Yes, and yes, thank you, you certainly may come home with me. I can haz military embellishments, as well. See you in 11-14 days, my new friend!

Hautelook access here!

Reconciling the martini and the beer

2010-03-04T09:48:00.005-05:00

My knack for picking the most expensive shoe out of a particular lineup (in this case, flats on sale) has been rumbling along in full force these days.

Kate Spade 'Nikki' flat,
$143.75 from $285

Botkier 'Viola' flat,
$194.40 from $299

Although, when almost every shoe I drool over is past the $100 price point, even on sale, my impulse buys definitely go down and my calm, reasoned pro-con list-writing goes up... I live such a difficult life :D

Take 30% off my sale!

2010-02-28T19:20:00.012-05:00

Ending tomorrow (Monday) at midnight, take an extra 30% off all sale items at J Crew. Discount code 'EXTRA30' !

Clean lines, supersaturated colors...likey likey. Now hear this--I don't love everything J Crew rolls out its doors, but I do have my faves. Please observe:

Gauzy layered neck details on this lavender 'Jersey streamers' tee, $20 from $36.50

Dark charcoal slub cotton ruffle v-neck, $24 from $39.50

'Dolce' shawl-collar popover sweater ($32 from $68) in an excellent shade of soft warm pink

Lovely little ankle stretch toothpick jeans, $72 from $125

And, Sylvia suede pumps ($72-$104 from $175). they aren't sky-high, but they have just the right classic twist. Which color? Decisions decisions...

Or, kick it up a notch and go with some 'Marlene' cris-cross metallic platform heels, $104 from $228

(Note: Prices listed above reflect the extra 30% off)

Sick Day

2010-02-23T20:43:00.001-05:00

Stretching Lady, Illustration by Coby Whitmore, originally uploaded by verylegalmuffin.

Taking a break today, sleeping, making crepes, sleeping some more. Back soon!

Aspirin...what?

2010-02-17T00:31:00.008-05:00

[BACKSTORY: By spending almost nothing for the past month and a bit, I have managed to get the final chunk of last-year's-unemployed-and-job-searching debt paid off my credit card. I am rather proud of myself, but I am also being seriously cheap. This period of extreme thriftitude has allowed me to discover some alternative things that are so cheap they should be illegal. Over the next few posts, I will be sharing the worthwhile ones.]

That would be an Aspirin Facial, and until this week I was a member of the skeptical uninitiated.

And so, on Sunday as I surveyed my winter-reptilian cheeks, I decided it was time for drastic (and fun! and cheap!) measures. Because who doesn't like to paw through their medicine cabinet, crush up pills and rub it all over their face? Eh? Eh?

I used this recipe here, and applied the paste as a neato masque:

Ingredients (with my modifications):

Four or five uncoated plain aspirin pills (hells to that--I used about 15, and they were all the coated kind!)
A tablespoon or two of lukewarm water (more like one teaspoon)
Honey or plain yogurt (about half a teaspoon of yogurt to stick it all together)

Plop about a teaspoon or so of lukewarm water on the aspirins in a classy highball glass. Swirl like a snifter of brandy as the pills fizz out and dissolve. Crush the holdouts with a spoon. If your paste is more like a sluice or a bog, rinse it out and start over--USE THAT WATER SPARINGLY.

Once you have achieved a dry paste, add a sploof of yogurt or honey or even citrus juice (for that extra sting?). I went with the yogurt option, and used a level teaspoon to stick the aspirin-y paste together for face-spreading purposes. Using the back of my spoon as a bricklayer's trowel, I plastered the mess all over my face, and rubbed it in little circles. Then I let it dry, and took sweet pics.

After 15-20 mins, I wiped it all off with a washcloth.

Warning: Every recipe and site I consulted included several warnings with their aspirin facial recipes, so I'd better not get all lax on you here. Ahem. Some people are allergic to aspirin. If you are, DON'T USE THIS FACIAL. If you don't know, RUB IT ON A TINY PATCH OF YOUR ARM, not your whole face, and see if you have a freaky reaction. REMEMBER, aspirin is medication--a drug--so for heaven's sakes don't do this facial every day. One site cautioned to limit your consumption of aspirin facials to NO MORE THAN TWO PER MONTH.

After reading all the scary warnings, I worried for a while that my face was going to fall off immediately after application, but we're going on four days now and all I can say is that this stuff has made my face soft soft soft and smooooth smoooth smoooooooth.

Total cost: Less than $3 for Target brand aspirin, plus a spoonful of plain yogurt from the stuff already in the fridge. Prep time was about 3 minutes of fizzing and crushing, rub-on-and-wait time was 15-20.

Bottom line: Cheapest facial ever, with fantastic results. Do this on a cold day after work, it's fun and strange.

Short Boot? Me?

2010-02-09T22:56:00.004-05:00

I've caved, but it feels so good

Maxstudio 'Umberto' short boot,
$165 from $220 ($129 here!)

Hi there, platform, v-wedge, and tapered cone! I didn't know you guys could all live together in harmony so...lusciously. Bravo.

AND, a great big thanks to Sally, author of Already Pretty, the blog that understands stompy boots, for turning me on to these truly excellent short boots. This photo of her svelte legs sealed the deal for me. After seeing it I simply had to have them, too:

(Nevermind that I won't be wearing them--or receiving them in the mail--until the D.C. blizzard goes away...)

When 5 Inch Legs Are Disadvantageous

2010-02-09T22:47:00.002-05:00

20 inches of snow on the ground...20 more coming tomorrow? I think the weenies will be staying indoors until spring...

Spending the Weekend Outdoors...

2010-02-08T00:11:00.006-05:00

...no cabin fever here!

Highly Effective Blizzard Strategy II

2010-02-05T19:15:00.001-05:00

Peanut in his winter outfit, originally uploaded by verylegalmuffin.

A nice plaid burrito outfit.

Highly Effective Blizzard Strategy

2010-02-05T19:04:00.001-05:00

Just Noses, Paws and Tails..., originally uploaded by verylegalmuffin.

Neck warmers

2010-02-04T15:29:00.006-05:00

and...

...perfect accessories for:

Has anybody checked out the most recent two-day forecast for the DC area? See above.

...Because you might better had go to the store tonight and pick up provisions. I'm serious. And dog food.

And, you know, other stuff that you might need while snowed into your house for three days straight. Which I would link to if I didn't know that my entire family reads this damn blog. Jerks. Quit it with the love and attention already.

Moving on.

I'm keeping my neck warm this weekend as well, with lovely scarves featured above (and below).

Bindya Abstract Silk Dotwork Scarf, $22 from $50

Bindya Camel Boiled Wool Polka Dot Scarf, $29 from $70

Email martini.lifestyle@gmail.com for access to Beyond the Rack sample sales!

Bow? BOW!

2010-02-04T15:16:00.004-05:00

This morning, I came across a tee by Wren I'd admired in the past, but dismissed out of hand because it was priced between $98 and $114. People, it's just a cotton tee with a screenprinted bow. That's it. Nice, but hell damn, I have bills to pay crazy Wren!

And now, loooong after I'd given up my brief fling with the idea of owning the ridiculously overpriced top, I encounter the same sweetly simple Wren tee on BDB, for $30! (Shoot me an email at martini.lifestyle@gmail.com for a BDB instant invite.)

$30 is a frivolity I can afford. Today. Thank you, BDB, the bow tee is MINE now. Yesss.

(Small, Modest) Retail Therapy?

2010-02-04T13:16:00.013-05:00

As you may have noticed, I am a huge proponent of solving problems (or simply resolving the inconvenience of occasionally having an irritating surplus of feelings...anger, sadness, frustration...all those really bothersome ones) by purchasing boots. Stompy ones.

Furthermore, if we gague Darling's stress level by the number of stompy boots per month she decides to purchase (the standard: one pair / month indicates moderate-to-high levels of stress/fury), and if this past month (January) has occasioned the purchase of THREE separate pairs of stompy (albiet beautiful) boots...we can conclude that Darling must be picking her way through a very thorny swamp. Metaphorically speaking.

Check 'em out:

Rosegold "Mary" black leather boot, $195 from $275

(I, however, found 'em on Gilt Fuse for $99!)

Rosegold 'Mary' grey leather boots, $193 from $275

(Again, I got mine on Gilt Fuse for $99!)

Rosegold 'Manon' oiled black suede buckle boot, $195 from $325
(Also find them here, and sometimes on Gilt Fuse for $99)

For some inexplicable reason, Rosegold's boots fit my stompy little feet like well-crafted, fashionable European armor. And, they make me feel less like her:

And more like her:

...in a good way(nsfw version here--sorry for the robot boobs, Brody!).

Today's photo credits include, from top to bottom: Brian Viveros, Tallulah Bankhead circa 1927, and a work called "Robotize" (?) whose source sadly eludes me.

Pleasant Weekend Zombie Attack

2010-01-30T23:03:00.007-05:00

Braains....BRAAAAAAAAAINSSSS......
Hi folks! You'll be hearing from me on a more regular basis in February, prooomise.

In case you've missed me this month (hell, I've missed me this month), here's a little video that I've been enjoying perhaps too much for my own good.

If you're looking for a seamless blend of (a) zombies, (b) sexy subservient household help, (c) Japanese cinematic storytelling sensibilities, and (d) claymation.... look no further than CHAINSAW MAID (capitalization mandatory) !!!

My, what a toothy dress you have....

2010-01-19T09:46:00.003-05:00

...houndstoothy, that is!

French Connection 'Hound' Dress,
$75 from $178

Max & Cleo Houndstooth Purple Ponte Dress,
$23.99 from $108

Just remember to keep your other items (jacket, scarf, tights...) on a solid-color rule while wearing the 'teeth! In case you missed our previous editions, check out the obsession here, here, here and here.

The Gloves Are Coming Off...

2010-01-14T10:02:00.005-05:00

...albeit exquisite (on sale!) Kate Spade lambskin bow gloves, but still...you really don't want to make me angry.

Apologies for the dearth of new-years posting, but your Darling has some serious decisions coming her way, and she needs to be prepared to the hilt.

Sunglasses...on!

Muted Colors, Winter Ideas...

2009-12-30T11:38:00.013-05:00

Basset Hound Puppy, 7 x 8 Fine Art Print by Sharon Montrose, $25

...namely, soft browns and warm greys. I've collected a selection of ideas, and arrayed them below for your viewing pleasure. Think, "refined...but snuggly...with lots of cashmere."

Cashmere and lambswool soft heather ruana,
(yes! another ruana!)
$123.90 from $248

Lauren Ramirez oxidized gold foil bud earrings,
$148

Ruffle-trim cashmere gloves,
$19.90 from $32

V-neck cashmere cardigan,
$56 from $148
(to get the sale price above, use discount code 'AFTER' at checkout)

BCBG Maxazria taffeta skirt,
$59.98 from $178

Sarah Swell fan coral earrings,
$160

Ralph Lauren bow detail windowpane gloves,

$16.80 from $35
(to get the sale price above, use discount code 'AFTER' at checkout)

Fringed plaid cashmere mufflers,
(I like 'grey windowpane' to match the bow gloves above)
$48 from $86
(to get the sale price above, use discount code 'AFTER' at checkout)

Mike & Chris warm grey jackguard silk dress, $235
(I own this dress, and LOVE it.
...Look for Mike & Chis to show up every so often on Hautelook and other invite-only sites, as the prices are otherwise rather high.)

Adrianna Papell belted ponte knit dress,
$79.90 from $122

Silk-flounced 'Bertie' chemise, $48
(a perfect underpinning for shorter dresses and tunics...even the dresses above!)

Jessica Simpson mini-studded suede-bow flats,
$22 from $69
(to get the sale price above, use discount code 'AFTER' at checkout)

Chie Mihara 'Ganz' flower-detail oxford pumps,
$224 from $350
(to get the sale price above, use discount code 'AFTER' at checkout)

Cynthia Vincent 'Dylan' convertible tall leather boots,
$234 from $350
(to get the sale price above, use discount code 'AFTER' at checkout)

Michael Michael Kors cropped camel pea coat,
$99.99 from $194

Portabello mushroom growing kit, $49.95
(um, cool!)

* bliss *

Yummy

2009-12-29T16:00:00.007-05:00

The day has brought us even more clean lines and stunning quality basic / classic / basics...with an Omelle twist. Maybe if I post these I won't be so tempted to buy them...especially with a site-wide 25% discount, code 'CANDYTOES' at checkout... *bites knuckle*

Omelle 'Cappy' pump in Manilla Rose,
$236.25 from $525

Omelle 'Brianna' pump in Rich Black,
$176.25 from $595

Some Basic Classics (Classic Basics?)

2009-12-29T10:34:00.005-05:00

While nosing through the Shopbop take-an-extra-20%-off-50%-and-70%-sale-items event (which just so happens to end tonight--use discount code 'EXTRA20'), I observed these two lovely items, below, and was struck by their elegant simplicity. If you are looking for a way to stay near-trend (versus "on-trend" which can be rather suffocating), but still remain firmly in the classics and clean lines camp, snap these up.

Rosegold 'Emily' booties,
$90 from $225

Vera Wang Lavender Label 'Falicita' Pumps,
$118 from $295

Incidentally, 'Rosegold' (which I think is a subsidiary of Modern Vintage) is my new favorite boot and shoe brand. I'm in love!

Merry Christmas

2009-12-24T22:45:00.005-05:00

A little light holiday reading...look up William "Snowflake" Bentley.

1 Excellent Gift: ...for my wallet

2009-12-23T16:02:00.003-05:00

The fact that these shoes are sold out on Gilt.

Guillaume Hinfray 'Judith' Flat,
$158 from $585

Guillaume Hinfray 'Deauville' Flat,
$168 from $600

I'm not gonna lie, this post is a bit of a cop-out.

But in my defense, the second thing I thought when I saw the Guillaume Hinfray shoe sale today (after "omgomgomg dotheyhavethoseimpossibletofindflats????") was "OH THANK GAWD, the shoes I have been drooling and lusting over are totally sold out..." My poor credit card needs a holiday rest. Whew.

In case yours doesn't need any rest...Gilt access here :)

1 Excellent Gift: Cheap Maids

2009-12-22T10:40:00.006-05:00

[via gemma_lily on Flickr]

Having spent the past three days solidly snowed into my wee condo, working from home and creating an ever-expanding ring of trash around my fortress of solitude (a.k.a. giant feather quilt), I jumped on this crazy deal like a wolf spider.

For a little under $60, you can have spiffy maids come and clean your crap shack! If you have ever hired a maid service before, you'll know that this is an insane deal. They regularly charge $160 for this service. Here's the crazy bit: when you use my special link, you get another $5 off the sale price resulting in the crazy deal of: $53, from $160.

I think my heart just skipped a beat. People will come to my house and clean the grit out of the bathroom, the dust monsters off the baseboards, the general floaty floor combo of my hair plus dachshund hair...all for FIFTY THREE buckeroos. I'm really going to faint.

You can get in on this deal yourself, or, better yet YOU CAN GIVE IT AS A GIFT (provided that the give-ee lives within a 20 mile radius of the DC area). Take that, last-minute shoppers.

The catch? Once a certain number of people buy into this deal, it sells out. All I can say is, CHEAP MAIDS! GET ON IT, LAZYBONES. That is all.

Details:

* Deal can be applied to an apartment or house cleaning for up to 3 bed/3 bath and 2500sq. ft
* No cash value
* Deal cannot be combined with any other offer or promotion
* First time clients only
* Any cleaning within 20 miles of DC is included in this deal price. (A $10 travel fee will be charged if you live outside of this DC area radius.)
* Deal must be redeemed by 06/18/2010

Background: LivingSocial Deals provides local consumers with opportunities to experience products and services from local merchants at outrageous discounts.

Winter Weenies

2009-12-19T23:31:00.008-05:00

Yeeeeeah! I love snow! I'm a snowplow!

In case you've been living under a rock, you've probably heard about how we got over a foot of snow today! As you can imagine, the weenies and I spent our day at home. Legend played in the snow for the first time...

Legend, with pink butt and ears up...

Plaaay with me...Around 9 a.m. this morning there were already about 16 inches of snow on the ground...

The snow was coming down fast and thick all day long.

At this point, Peanut started getting a strangely crazed look...
See? So, we decided it was time to go inside and sleep for the rest of the day.
Ahhh paws have thawed.

Fifteen minutes in snow over their heads = Fifteen hours like this.

Weekend "Thundersnow" in DC...10-20 Inches?

2009-12-18T15:37:00.006-05:00

Exqueeze me? I am only 10 inches tall. I have never seen this "snow" you speak of, and yet you tell me there may be thundersnow all weekend long?
I will stay here, beneath my pillow of safety.

Kthanks,

Legend
White Wiener Dog, Consummate Hedonist...Future Snowplow?

...

Dear Legend,

I agree. If you need me, I will be hiding in the human bed.
Short-haired frozen dachshund shivers,

Peanut

1 Excellent Gift: ...for me

2009-12-17T15:13:00.005-05:00

Double-Breasted Full-Circle Black Wool 'Olga' Coat,
$495 (a totally reasonable price...c'mon, it's couture!)

...you had me at 'voluminous'...although 'full-circle skirt,' 'military-inspired' and 'high imposing collar' helped a lot too...

Anybody want to buy this custom-fitted, custom-order, five hundred bone coat of amazingness for your favorite blogger? ...Next Christmas, you say? Ok, well, I'll just keep my fingers crossed then.

1 Excellent Gift: Cluster Necklace

2009-12-16T11:49:00.003-05:00

Gorjana 'Roosevelt Cluster' Necklace, $41.25 from $55

TODAY ONLY (12/16), Gorjana is offering 25% off everything with discount code 'HOLIDAY09'

PLUS! Free Ground and 3-Day Shipping.

AND! Guaranteed Delivery by December 23rd.

I must say, this is a real relief for me.

(A) I was worried I wouldn't be able to fill my final Christmas present needs in time for, well, Christmas,

(B) I hate paying for shipping, and

I will be scooping these trinkets, and chuckling my evil little heart out!

1 Excellent Gift: Belted Wrist Gloves

2009-12-15T22:44:00.003-05:00

Red Sheepskin Belted Wrist Gloves, $60 from $75

Pssst...use discount code 'INSTYLE10' for 20% off everything at Le Train Bleu until 12/31!

1 Excellent Gift: Lavender Things

2009-12-13T09:37:00.007-05:00

...Santa's on his way, he's filled his sleigh with things...lavender things...for you and for me!

Sweet Human Heart Lavender Sachets, $15

Giant Lavender Bags, $39

Lavender Fleur de Sel Caramels, $6.99

Lavender Sencha Green Tea, $18

Honey Lavender Shortbread Cookies, $8.00
Delicious!

1 Excellent Gift: Misfortune Cookies

2009-12-13T09:32:00.003-05:00

Cookie Misfortune 10-pack, $9.99

Share these ten misfortunes with your dearest misanthrope :)

1 Excellent Gift: Some Bling

2009-12-11T07:00:00.000-05:00

'Duchess' Stone Necklace,
$69.99 from $98

I like my costume jewelry like I like my chicklets...totally square and just sitting there!

1 Excellent Gift: A Snappy Red Jacket

2009-12-10T15:44:00.004-05:00

Free People 'Boyfriend' jacket,
$107.52 from $168

Note: Get the price listed above during Bloomingdale's current "Take 20% off Selected Merchandise" promotion, PLUS discount code 'SITM20' which allows you to "Take an EXTRA 20% off Selected Merchandise." I know, it's confusing, but the end result is that you pay way less for a snappy red jacket! Woot.

1 Excellent Gift: A Cool Purple Watch

2009-12-10T15:28:00.004-05:00

Nixon Portrait Watch, $50 from $100

As you may recall, I have long admired Nixon watches for their clean lines and bold shapes. And now, they have their own special limited-run sale on Gilt Fuse! Gilt Fuse access here.

1 Excellent Gift: Fatten Your Friends

2009-12-10T07:00:00.000-05:00

...with a dozen mouth-meltingly ridiculous cupcakes from Georgetown Cupcake--whose new online shop ships everywhere in the United States!!!!

1 Excellent Gift: Color Your Walls

2009-12-09T16:43:00.005-05:00

Yeah, how about you pay attention to your grim, blank walls, you artless bastard!

JHill Design 'Mexico' city print, $25-$65

Or, more diplomatically, "Here is a lovely archival print I purchased just for you!"

JHill Design 'Tuscany' city print, $25-$65

Animal motifs suit me just fine...

'T' is for Tortoise, $25-$50

'X' is for X-Ray, $15

I really should stop inferring that I use gifts to insult people. It's just fun to write this way :)

1 Excellent Gift: Terra Cotta Makeup

2009-12-09T13:21:00.004-05:00

Cargo 'Mediterranean Nights' Makeup Palate,
$29 from $34

With its neat embossed cover details and warm/neutral terra cotta pigments, this little palate would make a great gift for your most appearance-challenged friends...or your own greedy little self (yes, I will admit that most of these gift ideas could totally be purchased for one's self)...

Four eyeshadows, two bronzer/blusher thingies...quite a haul.

Thanks for the sale tip-off, Erin!

Music Video as Fugue

2009-12-09T13:04:00.004-05:00

"The TV Show" is an animated (anime-ated? heh) short film / music video directed by Sugimoto Kousuke with music by Manabe Takayuki. It takes a few watchings to absorb the complex layers of action, repetition, and variation taking place in quick succession (watch it in HD).

Strangely enough, in many ways it reminds me of a Baroque-era fugue composition...

(Via Coilhouse, nach)

1 Excellent Gift: Blouse With Crazy Bow

2009-12-09T10:00:00.000-05:00

Stephanie Blouse 'Buttercup Pony,'

$144 from $225

Hmmm...after looking at this blouse for a while, I can't decide if I'm starting to hate it, or if it's just the model's hideous face that's bumming me out...

Let's reduce the painful distractions...

I still can't decide if I like it anymore. Oh well, reserve this gift for an enemy?

P.S., Use discount code 'GIFT20' for 20% off everything at SHE Boutique until 12/10.

1 Excellent Gift: Python Clutch

2009-12-09T07:00:00.001-05:00

Pantera 'Bullet' Cobra clutch,
$209.25 from $395

Pink is pretty nice, too :)
Take an extra 25% off sitewide with discount code SALE25 through 12/17.

1 Excellent Gift: Twinkly Boots

2009-12-08T21:39:00.003-05:00

Matiko 'Frosty' studded suede boots,
$179.25 from $348
(get this price with code, below)

...slight wedge...doe suede...subtle twinkles...yes, these boots are a go.

Take an extra 25% off sitewide with discount code SALE25 through 12/17.

1 Excellent Gift: Printed Silk Tanks

2009-12-07T11:39:00.004-05:00

Tuck them under your crispest tiny black blazer, or...be all generous and gift them to your pals. Either way, I won't judge.

Eight Sixty printed silk tank, $29 from $68

Eight Sixty knotted-back tank, $29 from $68

Ideeli access here.

1 Excellent Gift: Branching Earlobes

2009-12-02T12:04:00.005-05:00

Plum beads, Swarovski crystals, golden branches. I like it. Clean-lined and refreshing wintery costume jewelry--the perfect thing to wear when making your entrance in a room full of tacky bow and bell-covered holiday earrings.

Mrs. Wingeter Earrings (2" hang), $26
(click top photo for larger image)

Part of our excellent gift series...

1 Excellent Gift: Houndsteeth

2009-12-02T11:24:00.007-05:00

Great googly moogly I enjoy my houndstooth. But, you already know that. Check out today's excellent gift--a David & Young houndstooth ruana:

Houndstooth Ruana,
$14.04 (use code below for this price) from $40

Wait...WTF is a ruana?

Ahem. A ruana is like a cape but the front and back panels are of equal length and the sleeves are not stitched. This allows the wearer to throw one, or both, panels over the opposite shoulder.

Basically, it's a huge scarfy shawl that's so big you can hide inside it. How exciting is that??

Furthermore, Macy's is offering a friends and family discount code. Use code 'MACYSFRIEND' for 25% off sitewide, plus free shipping.

Merry Houndstoothmas. More gifts to come today...

Cyber Monday, Part 3: Even MORE (MOAR?) Codes

2009-11-30T17:02:00.007-05:00

[Image by Lurazzz on Flickr]

MMMmmmm cooooodes.

It's getting late, so I'll get down to business. Some of the following codes expire today (11/30), while others last a little longer. I will indicate expiry as I go.

Chick Downtown: 25% off full priced items with code "SHOP25" - expires tomorrow (12/1)

Gorjana jewelry and accessories: 25% off sitewide + free shipping with code "HOLIDAY09" - expires today (one of my fave costume jewelry designers--see my picks at end of post!)

Le Train Bleu: 30% off sitewide with code "CYBERMONDAY" - expires Wednesday (12/2)

Origins: $10 off online purchases of $25 or more (excludes gift sets) with code "TENOFF09" - expires today (thanks, T!)

Piperlime: 20% off sitewide (exclusions apply) with code "MONDAY" - expires today

[dotdotdot]

Regarding the Gorjana sale ("HOLIDAY09") above--I'm totes for shotes oogling the following items--both for their subtle cheekiness and eminent wearability:

3/8" Star Stud Earrings
$26.25 from $35

0.4" Porter Stud Earrings (silver or gold!),
$41.25 from $55
...wheeee...if I have any energy left tonight, I'll post my faves of the day...

Cyber Monday, Part 2: More Codes

2009-11-30T10:33:00.006-05:00

And...we're back (for just a moment--why can't my clients understand that it's Cyber Monday? Heh. Just kidding clients, you know you come first). Aaanyhow, in addition to the codes from our previous entry, here are some more (in alphabetical order, no less)!

Basic Boutique: 40% off sitewide (excludes final sale items) with code "THANKS40" - expires today.

Bloomingdales: $50.00 off all purchases of $250 and up no code required (applied at checkout) - expires today.

Goldyn online boutique: 30% off new arrivals, 50% off all sale items with code "MONDAY" - expires today.

Max & Chloe jewels and accessories: 20% off sitewide with code "TGIV9" - expires today.

NY & Company: 50% off sitewide no code required - expires today. For free shipping, enter code "4136" at checkout.

SHE boutique: 30% off sitewide (except for brand Sword) with code "CYBERMONDAY" - expires today.

White House Black Market: 20% off sitewide + free shipping with code "8002" - expires today.

...more to come...!

Cyber Monday Woooooo!

2009-11-30T09:33:00.005-05:00

["Monkey Threats" graphic novel image, source unknown]

Mornin' peeplets. I'm a busy monkey for the first part of the day, so until I have the chance to bring you my own take on today's Cyber Monday selections (remember last year?), please check out Grechen's masterful code compendium of exclusive Cyber Monday discounts! Also, if those codes aren't enough for you, please peruse the code list in its entirety. I'll be back soon to cherry pick the best for you ;)

1 Excellent Gift: Friday

2009-11-27T01:46:00.010-05:00

[image via]

Now see here: I don't smoke. But, when I do, I prefer tiny cigars. Honey and vanilla are particularly nice. The point is, on the relatively occasions that I decide to indulge, the proper accessories are vital. Clean lines and quality construction--what more can a girl ask for?

That's why these crazy little 'QUEUE' squared-off stick lighters from Japan have been on my radar for a while now:

Go for two-tone (at $30)...

...or, bump it up to metallics (also $30).

Slim, discreet, looks a little bit like something else...

...but it's not. Nope, definitely a lighter.

Now, I love MollaSpace, but I think it's interesting that the site goes out of its way to insist lighters have nothing to do with smoking. Per the description: Featured in Everyday with Rachael Ray April 2008, Everday Faves Fun: Light candles in style with them!

* insert really shifty eyes right here, darting back and forth *

[...yeeees...light candles in style...that is why you'd carry this around in your purse and coordinate it with your outfit...so that you can be prepared to...light random candles while out on the town...makes perfect sense...]

Sure, MollaSpace, whatever helps you sleep at night. Just don't get too close to me with that questionable reasoning or I'll cut you but good.

From Today Until Christmas: 1 Excellent Gift Per Day...

2009-11-26T16:15:00.002-05:00

Source: Indeterminate Russian magazine image...

New feature alert! Heh, that makes me sound like I'm some sort of conglomerate publication or media hub. Rather flattering, no? Well regardless, here's what we're going to do as soon as you kids quit munching that turkey (don't worry, the leftovers will still be there when you return):

Martini Lifestyle will be bringing you at least ONE classy, unusual, reasonably-priced gift idea per day from today until Christmas. I'll be posting things I'm considering for * ahem * myself, my family and friends, as well as items that catch my eye. Please enjoy.

First up:

Gara Danielle gold-plated brushed locket
on a 14" chain with tourmaline embellishments,

$65 from $168

^I am loving these subtle details!

This locket is reminiscent of the Gara Danielle cameo pendant I purchased about a zillion years ago, which has become a foundational piece of my costume jewelry collection. Hautelook access here, for those of you woefully behind the times :)

Epically Awesome...

2009-11-26T11:14:00.000-05:00

Tom Gauld, Characters for an Epic Tale
If only this print weren't sold out. Blarrrgh.

In Afghanistan, turkey is called "elephant chicken"

2009-11-26T00:38:00.004-05:00

Happy elephant chicken day.

From "Dead Zone Boys," by Jookabox
Asthmatic Kitty Records. Direction, Animation, Design: Rafa Toro

Impatience Is Knowing Your Handmade Fleur de Sel Caramel Is Going to Arrive Sometime Within the Next Three Days...

2009-11-22T15:54:00.006-05:00

Handmade Fleur de Sel Caramel 'by the log,' $9.00 - $17.00

Have It Sweet is a brilliant and frustraaaating confectioner.

Why brilliant?

-----------> "We use truly the best ingredients, and we take our Fleur de Sel Caramel very seriously. Our Fleur de Sel (French Sea Salt) is hand harvested and unrefined, but we go a step further and use one of the finest imported French salts on the market, M. Gilles Hervy Fleur de Sel.

Have It Sweet's Master Chef, Vincent, has worked long and hard to make this recipe from scratch. It is unduplicatable as he created this recipe himself over the past four years. This caramel is a labor of love. One I am confident you will adore as much as we do."

Why frustrating?

-----------> Because everything they sell is made to order in small, carefully crafted batches. As a result, I have been waiting FOURTEEN DAYS for my caramel to arrive in the mail. Fourteen long, suffery days of no handmade salted caramel to nourish and sustain me. Weep.

Houndstooth Panacea: Outerwear Edition...for Humans

2009-11-19T10:41:00.006-05:00

Get it? Houndstooth outerwear?

Heeheehee I couldn't resist.
Via Long/Short and Noodle.

Okokok, on to human clothing...

FYI, ending today, take an extra 25% off site-wide at Smartbargains through this link.
UPDATE - SALE EXTENDED! With this link, it ends tomorrow at 11:59PM (PST)!

Dilemma: I'm dreadfully weary of the solid-color outerwear offerings that ooze through the stores these days, but I still need to look polished and professional (i.e., no neon pink stripes).

Solution? Houndstooth, my frequently aforementioned go-to classic suiting pattern. Acceptable alternatives: herringbone, glen plaid.

Joan Vass houndstooth a-line coat,
$142.49 from $330

Tahari 'Candy' black houndstooth coat,
$74.99 from $200

AK Anne Klein houndstooth check wool coat,
$74.99 from $220

Tahari 'Candy' grey houndstooth coat,
$74.99 from $220

To get the 25% site-wide discount (and the prices listed above), I recommend adding everything you want to your cart first, then clicking this link, and checking your shopping cart to see the discount applied. But, you'll figure it out. You're all smart chickens.

Bonus! Gwen Stefani in sequined houndstooth:

Via Modette.

Repettos...deeply discounted...Ideeli... gasp

2009-11-19T10:29:00.005-05:00

Omg. Omgomgomgomg.
* regaining control *

Link to Repetto Sale here, beginning at 11AM EST today.
(Ideeli access)
You probably don't need me to hear me wax poetic yet again about my very favorite brand of shoes.

So, I won't.
*eeeeee*

Black Mood ...Misanthropy ....Misanthropology ...Mis Anthropologie ...Boots.

2009-11-18T15:45:00.011-05:00

Some people react to unexpectedly stressful situations by smoking cigarettes.

Others eat "comfort" food. I advise against this, because when you start rewarding yourself with food, you train yourself to associate the physical act of eating with a specific sought-after emotional high. In short, you will get fat. Fatty. My suggested solution to reverse the effect of this particular habit is to only eat the aforementioned comfort foods while standing naked in front of a full length mirror. Yeah. See how much you want to eat then. Fatty fatty fat fat. Ok, back to my original point...

Me? I buy boots. Stompy boots. We've been over this a few times before.

As I have not yet successfully obtained this season's stompy boot goal, today's events have prompted the final trigger-pull on these previously-adored stompies:

Miss Albright 'Sidesaddle' boots, $248
Swoon.

Husband, if you are reading this, do not fret. The last three pairs of boots that arrived at our house were no-gos, and thus returned to their respective retailers. Ergo, my boot fund is still fully...funded at this time. No extra debt beyond the eBay earnings originally allocated to the fund. Our finances are still in order. Smooches!

Photo credits, top to bottom:
The surly smoking woman is by Brian Viveros
(one of my favorite artists)
The light eater is by Koren Shadimi
(also becoming a fave)
The headless nude woman is by Thorsten Jankowski
(site marginally NSFW)

The Complex of All of These

2009-11-14T22:10:00.003-05:00

Remember how you felt after watching this?

Here's another. Crank up the volume (artist Ratatat) blow this vid up full screen, and see a book created from thread and pulp. Meditative. Hypnotizing.

Details on the actual book here. Although I must say, after reading the description of the actual book, ermmm, my 'pretentious bastard' sense is definitely tingling ($700, really?), and I fear it might be more beautiful to witness the process of its physical composition than to read its contents...

MmmMM?

2009-11-13T11:17:00.004-05:00

I can't decide if this dress is all poofy-awesome or just poofy-disaster...

Romeo & Juliet Couture tube bubble dress,
$88 from $220

Eh? Eh?

Hautelook access.

Couch Potatoes

2009-11-13T11:00:00.002-05:00

I can't wait for this work day to end, so I can go home to these little potatoes. Yes, I thought it was time for some gratuitous weenies. Please enjoy.